i want this to have a good outcome.
i want to gain experience from this loss, patch it to myself, as knowledge for later, or whatever.
i have no perserverance.
i want to be strong.
yeah, people change.
yeah, friends leave.
but i can’t seem to get myself to accept that, let alone understand this.
i’m trying soooo hard to make the best of this.
but i have no idea how.
i don’t want to go running back.
are you even there to run back to?
seriously. it will never be like before.
but i can’t seem to grip this….
i can’t just pretend like i never had a friend like you, through my hardest times.
but i can’t pretend like it’s always going to be like that, either.
we had been through alot together.
damn. but, i guess we’ve moved on?
i don’t know what the fuck to say.
i don’t know what i feel, what you feel.
i can’t just let this go, but i want to so bad.
it’s been so hard for a long time, just pretending. i don’t want to do that anymore.
at first i felt relieved, but now, in a way, i feel empty.
